Do I believe enough?

I have this verse hanging above my computer and I look at it several times a day;

"Therefore I tell you, whatever you ask for in prayer, believe that you have received it, and it will be yours. And when you stand praying, if you hold anything against anyone, forgive him, so that your Father in Heaven may forgive you for your sins." Mark 11:24-25

Whatever you ask for in prayer, believe that you have received it and it will be yours. That is some pretty powerful stuff. Do I not believe enough? I sure think I believe enough. I believe that God can heal me, that He can take this disease away from me, but maybe my belief is not strong enough, or maybe I don't believe it enough, or maybe I'm not doing my part, whatever that is. Is that why I'm not totally healed yet? I've always wondered in the back of my mind if I have something I'm holding against someone that I'm not confessing, and that is why I'm not healed?

I don't think that's the case, but maybe it is. I've asked the Lord to search my heart, and I always feel the same. But, I have to confess as a Christian lady I sometimes don't understand why I'm not healed of this disease. It's a bummer, and I'm tired of being sick :(

Am I doing something wrong Lord? I know that MS is a progressive disease and it gets a little bit worse, year by year. Some people with MS are in a lot worse shape than me, and then there are some who are doing better. I was thinking that maybe I'm more of a witness for Jesus being sick, than I ever would be if I were healthy? Is that it? Maybe that's why I continue to live with MS. I just can't see the ways of Providence, none of us can. I guess I'll just have to ask Jesus when I see Him face to face :)

Meantime, I will keep a smile on my face, thanking God for every breath He gives. What are you thoughts on believing and healing, blog friends? I'd love to hear your comments. Have a fabulous Sunday friends :)

My verse is from Mark 11-24-25 (above in red) and my prayer for today is:

Lord Jesus:

Search my heart and help me with anything I may be holding against anyone. Lord, you have forgiven me of my sins, help me to forgive others that may have sinned against me. Help me to BELIEVE in your mighty Healing power and trust in You for everything and always.

In Jesus Name I pray,
Amen