Under His Wings, you will find refuge.

Under His Wings, you will find refuge.

Thursday, December 30, 2010

I live with a Thankful Heart!

Since I began this blog in April of this year, my life has totally changed. Eight months of turning everything over to Him, and eight months of transformation, pure and simple. But I want more. I want more of Him and His mighty power in my life. I live with a thankful Heart and that is what I want to continue to do.

I had been suffering with Multiple Sclerosis for almost 13 years since my diagnosis in 1998, and for many years before that when they finally found out what was actually wrong with me. I was always smiling, and trying to do the best I could, always looking to the positive, that's me! But, especially these last 3 years, my life seemed to be heading in a downward spiral in many directions, almost like a fireworks sparkler out of control and I was beginning to lose it.

In 2008,had a bad accident and broke my shoulder and it seems that from that time on, everything seemed to spin out of my control with my health, my emotions, my family life, and basically everything and for everyone around me. Then, I had a massive MS attack in 2009, and that was it. I had to admit it, I was worn out.

I felt for the first time, that maybe MS really had won, something I would not admit to anyone, especially myself. Maybe this was all life had to offer me, a small world centered around my declining health, my disgruntled family and my faithful and loving, but increasing frustrated husband.

I needed help! Call in the marines, she screamed! I prayed and I prayed for the Lord to show me the way.

And, of course, He did. He  showed me to slow down and stop. He showed he that He was the way, and my trust and obedience were the way. My humanness wanted to go everywhere except where I needed to be, which was at the feet of my Lord. I decided right then and there to quit relying on myself and to call on the superhero of the ages-- God Almighty. 

He is the one from whom my strength has always come. I knew it, of course, but I just didn't want to admit it. I was running away, and He was ever so gently, ever so patiently, pulling me back to Him. And you know what I realized? He is a thousand times better than any Superman, Bateman, Spiderman, Ironman, or any Power Ranger you may have ever seen or heard of. He is my creator, He knows every hair on my head, He knows all the desires of my heart, every thought I have, good and bad. He knows everything about me, because He is the one that created me in my mother's womb.

I have always enjoyed the internet, and was increasing beginning to enjoy Facebook, this new way of communicating with old friends and making lots of new ones too. The Lord was putting the idea of beginning a blog, to start watching Him work in the lives of me and my family, so I said, "OK, Lord I'll do it."

As I turned away from myself and my selfishness and back towards my creator, amazing things began to happen in my life and in the life of my family. I started to write this GodWatch 365 blog, and slowly but surely, my world began to change. I was connecting with alot of new people, I was learning and listening and talking to people I would have never dreamed would enter my life.

I learned about CCSVI, a new angioplasty surgery to help the symptoms of MS. It was something new and wasn't being offered in many places around the country, not yet at least. As I began to investigate further into this amazing new discovery MS treatment, it just seemed that God opened up every door for me, and every window too, and my hearts desire, which was to feel better, was granted. I found that the procedure was being done right near me at Moffitt in Tampa! I had the CCSVI angioplasty surgery in August, and I feel better than I have in years! This was totally a God-Thing as I like to say. It came out of now where. I firmly believe there are no coincidences in life, there are only God incidences, and this was one of them. It was clear as day to me. I continue to improve each day with strength I didn't know I had or could ever find again. It has totally been from God, and you know what? It makes sense. He designed my body, and only He can heal me!

The next thing that happened what a also something totally of God. We had been having increasing challenges with our youngest son, who for many years was a unruly, defiant, out of control and rebellious punk, I guess would be a good way to describe him. He had been arrested a few times, was heavily into smoking pot and doing God knows what else. The devil really had a hold of that kid, and we thought at times that he (the devil) had won that battle, but of course, it was our own lack of faith that was being tested. Jordy went to jail and this time, Jesus got a hold of him and He completely changed his life and in the process, He changed ours also. Only God can change someone that way he did our son, he is a new creation in Christ and we are so thankful.

Yes, Jordy has had challenges of being pulled back into his old life because the devil does not give up easily. His old buddies are home for the holidays and there have been parties, and he's been out later than usual, but just this morning, he went to a Fellowship of Christian Atheletes breakfast in Tampa, and came back renewed and refreshed and fired up for the Lord. Seeing him like that again, made me smile. God is still in Charge! Thank you Jesus.

I've been very involved with everything I'm doing for the CCSVI Alliance in their quest to spread the word about CCSVI to everyone around the world and it's all good. I feel that I am helping others learn about this life changing procedure and maybe help alleviate tremendous suffering for many others with MS and I know that Jesus is smiling down.

But today, as this year winds down, I wanted to stop and reflect on 2010 and what it has meant to me and my family and look forward to the future, with renewed energy. I want to rededicate myself to my Lord. I want to ask Him each day to use me the way He wants to use me. I want to glorify Him in everything I do, because it's not about me, it's about Him!

It's so easy to get caught up in ourselves and in our little world. It's so easy to think that we are in charge of everything that happens in our lives. That kind of thinking can only lead you to tremendous heartache and sorrow and put a heavy burdens on you. You are not in charge! None of us are! God is in control and oh friends, what comfort there is in that. Our job is to trust and obey and let Him take care of all the details and boy, is He ever good at His job! Talk about a job description, he's got the resume of the century!

Are you wanting to start fresh for the New Year? Are you tired of the way your life has been going? My recommendation would be this: Start fresh with Jesus by your side and you will not be disappointed. Give Him all your concerns, all your trouble and worries, and everything you have. Turn away from your sins, turn away from your old way of thinking and give it all to Jesus. He can handle it. He has very broad shoulders, and He will quickly become your best friend and you too, can live with a Thankful Heart!

So, what does God have in store for me in 2011? I don't know, but I do know that it's got to be something really good, and so I'm waiting, watching, obeying and trusting Him to bring it to fruition! We serve a Mighty God!

A very joyous New Year to you and your family and may all your dreams come true in 2011~~

My verse for today is one of my favorites from Proverbs:3,5-6

" Trust in the Lord with all your heart, and lean not on your own understanding, in all your ways acknowledge Him, and He will direct your paths."

My prayer for today:

Heavenly Father
Thank you for the many blessings of this incredible year. I stand in awe of your Mighty Power and your faithfulness.Help me to totally rely on your for everything in my life. Help me to turn away for the world, and back to you. Lord, there are many others things on my heart, and you know what they are. I know that you are in control of all, and everything will work out in your perfect timing, according to your will. Please help me to be obedient and patient. Help me to trust you for everything, everyday. You are my source of life Lord, help me to never forget that.

In Jesus Name I pray,
Amen and Amen