Wednesday, August 18, 2010

Our God is "The Dream Giver"

Have you read the wonderful book by Bruce Wilkinson, entitled " The Dream Giver?" I bought the book and read it many years ago, and loved it. Yesterday, while cleaning, I discovered it again under my night table. It is a quick and easy read, so I opened it and began to let the words flow through me. It has even more meaning to me right now because of some of the increased stresses I am personally am going through as it relates to my MS and my upcoming CCSVI procedure tomorrow and some of the situations we are going through as a family, as well.

I believe with the author that the Lord God Almighty wants us to dream BIG! He only wants the biggest and best for our lives if we are willing and able and up for the task!

I have been dreaming over the last 12 years about God healing my body. I have dreamed for it, and I have prayed. There have been many people praying for me these past 12 years, and they have not given up. They have continued to tell me "We're praying and believing for God's miracle to heal you." I would always answer that I believe it to, because I have believed with all my heart, that in His perfect timing, God was going to move and begin my healing.

The road has been long and arduous, but the Lord has been with me, all the way. I've tried pretty much every drug available, some have helped, others my body has had severe reactions too. All the while, I have been believing in God's promise of never leaving or forsaking me, in good times and bad. I can tell you that there have been alot of down times, when I have doubted that I was ever going to feel better. With MS being a progressive disease, and the drugs only slowing down that progression, there have been many lonely times, many times I've thought "Lord, please heal me so I can more effectively serve you." I am your servant, what's the problem Jesus?"

But I have always known that God has a plan for my life, and have believed that this time is my "Wasteland"  or Exodus time as it says in the book. Tomorrow, my Wasteland days are over and I am moving to the Promise Land! Thank you Jesus for any and all things you are going to do through this procedure tomorrow. My life is in your Hands.

My verse for today:

Matthew 4:23

"Jesus went through Galilee, teaching in their synagogues, preaching the good news of the kingdom and healing every disease and sickness among the people."

My prayer for today:

Thank you for honoring my dreams of healing! You ARE the Dream Giver, and I am claiming that my dream will come true! Thank you for totally ordering the events of the last 5 months to bring me to this place in time. Thank you for any and all healing that will take place in my body tomorrow. Thank you for guiding me to Dr. Arslan. Be with him tomorrow, be right in that operating room with all the doctors and nurses as they perform my procedure. Give me your peace. I am praising you and thanking you for everything in my life Lord, I know it comes by your hand. Thank you for faithful family and friends who have prayed for many years for my healing. Thank you for my wonderful husband and sons and the gift that they have been in my life. Thank you Jesus for everything. I praise your Holy Name!

In your Holy name I pray,
Amen













Tuesday, August 17, 2010

Jordy's story - God is faithful!

I am rejoicing with everything in my soul today! I am singing praising to the Lord for the great things he has done. I am forever amazed at God and his perfect timing! He answers our prayers, in His perfect timing, not ours.

There are so many things God-things going on in my life right now, I am about to explode! I want to share with you about my son Jordy and the struggles he has faced these past 4-5 years. God gave him a real breakthrough this past Sunday and brought  him to his knees. I believe with all my heart that this is a new beginning for Jordy and our family. Please know that what I am to going to share with you I do with Jordy's full permission and encouragement." As he said - "Mom, maybe it will help someone else with their problems and lead more people to Jesus and bring Glory to God. I'm not perfect, but I'm forgiven and want to try to start my life over again."

Prior to beginning this blog, we had events happening in our lives and I felt God moving, even though I wasn't sure how everything was going to turn out....are we ever? Anyway, I began praying fervently, asking the Lord what he wanted me to do, and the answer came like a hard, fast ball. "You love the internet, you like to blog, how about using your talents for me, and let the world see what I am doing?" OK - Lord, I thought, let's go....

I began this Godwatch365 blog last April, with the Lord's guidance and love and my goal was for everyone, including all my friends and family, to be able to share a year in my ordinary and often boring life to see if we could identify God at work. I have been overwhelmed by the Lord's answer to prayer, because things sure are changing in me and in lives all around me. All to the Glory of God! WOW - He doesn't mess around!

Many of you have seen first hand or may have heard about the struggles we have had with our younger son Jordy.  Unfortunately, we had to kick him out of our home 4 times since he began his senior year in high school. It has been a very difficult stretch for our family these past 4 to 5 years. He has had a very tough time growing up. Jordy has had a very insidious marijuana addiction, among other things. He was selling pot, lying, stealing, and totally disrespectful to me and my husband, and has been arrested twice. Only God knows what else he was doing, but I'm sure it wasn't good. Addiction genes run deep in both of our families, so both of our kids, are unfortunately, genetically loaded with addiction predispositions. To say we've been concerned would be the understatement of the century. We've been to counseling many times, without avail.

All through these past years, Jordy has had a self-righteous I'm right, you're wrong, the cops are wrong, attitude. Pot's not bad, it's natural and grown in God's earth, 'we're out of touch,' I'm sure you're familiar with the usual arguments. All through this we've earnestly prayed for our son, while this was tearing at every fiber of our beings. Steve and I have had all the guilt issues, all the blame issues, all of the 'what did we do wrong arguments.' "You spoiled him rotten," Steve said, "All you did was scream at him, I rallied." Satan was having a field day in this house and in the life of our son. On and on it went for a few years. But throughout, we did manage to continue to pray for him, and ask our friends and family to pray for him. That was the glue that was holding us together, absolutely no doubt about it. I knew it and Steve knew it too.

But deep within my soul, I truly felt that Jordy was going to come out of this bad spell and shine for God. Especially these past 6 months, I just felt so strongly that God had his hand on our son and in His time he would be ok. It's that waiting thing that is always so difficult, isn't it? It was ripping my husband's heart apart. He was so discouraged and disappointed.

About a month ago, Jordy violated his probation and a warrant was issued for his arrest. After about spending 5 weeks hiding somewhere (we don't know where), he finally did the right thing, and turned himself into the jail one week ago today. All through his legal issues these past few years, Steve and I have backed away, with the attitude of  "He got himself into this, he's gotta get himself out." The first time he was arrested a few years ago, he bailed himself out. This time, Jordy called us from the jail, begging us to get him out. It seems his bail was quite a bit higher than he had figured, and he didn't have enough money. He called 4 times, and tearfully we told him no, that we were not going to bail him out. The last time he called, he seemed more at peace with his situation, which I felt better about. We told him again that we and alot of other people were praying for him."

We didn't hear from him on Saturday, which I thought was odd, but I knew that the Lord was working in his heart. We went to church on Sunday morning, praying and praising the Lord with much faith When we returned home the phone rang. Again, we accepted the collect charges. He began talking...." Mom," silence....."Yes Jordy, how are you doing today?" "Mom, I've better than I've been in a long, long time." Then the tears flowed as he began to pour his heart out. "Mom, I'm so sorry for everything I've put you and Dad through." You guys were right about everything. I was so, so wrong." Can you ever forgive me for everything I've done and said to you?" I assured him to it was already done and that I loved him so very much and so happy that the Lord was moving in his life. I told him that God was answering our prayers!!!

He talked to his Dad, and for the first time in years, I heard Steve say "It's ok pal, I forgive you." Hearing those familiar and precious words from his loving father, gladdened my heart so much. I haven't heard Steve call his son "pal" in many years because Jordy hasn't acted much like anyone's pal for quite a while, especially his father's.

Last night, we went to see Jordy at jail and I am thrilled to say that he is a new and different man. He had a big smile on his face, which I haven't seen in quite a while. He shared with us that since he turned himself in, God has really been working on him. He began reading a book called Coming Clean, about a man, who was a Columbian Drug Lord who turned his life around and is a born again Christian. Then Sunday he went to church at jail. As he walked back to his cell, he said he collapsed on the floor crying, "Forgive me Jesus for my many sins." All the people around him were looking at him and staring and he said "I didn't care Mom, I just kept asking God to forgive me for all my sins against Him and against my Mother and Father. I composed myself and I got up and went back to my cell. The first thing I wanted to do was call you and Dad."

Honestly, I can say that I have never seen my son like this before in his short life. I've seen him upset, but I've never seen him repentant for any of his actions. A few months ago, during one of his short stays back at home, he did go to church, and through an old family friend, went to the altar and accepted Jesus or so he said. But then, within 24 hours it was business as usual. This time, I believe that it is the real deal.  He admitted to us that not only was he addicted to pot, he was quickly approaching becoming an alcoholic, as well. That really didn't surprise me, but it was still a bit of a shock. He said "I've sinned so much Mom, enough for a lifetime."I'm done with it, I want to live my life for Jesus now." God has answering our many prayers, friends...

As we were talking last night, and the time ticked down on the clock, 5 minutes, 4 minutes, he looked at me and asked me if we could pray. I sat, composing myself for a second to begin my praye for him, but Jordy began on his own with this heartfelt prayer of praise and repentance, head bowed and left arm raised, praising God. It was one of the most beautiful things I have even seen.

He said "Please tell everybody I know how sorry I am if I've hurt them Mom, and tell them thank you so much for all their prayers. They mean so much, God was listening to those prayers, cause He changed my life. I'm never going back. I'm gonna make you and Dad proud. I'm going to live my life for God now."

WOW - You talk about God moving! He has moved with a Mighty Hand in the life of my son in his perfect time! Thank you to everyone of you who have prayed for Jordy. Stay tuned and see what God is going to do in the life of His young, changed servant." Jordy's certainly not perfect, and I'm sure he will make many mistakes, as we all do. He'll stumble, cause he's human, but for the first time in a long while, Jordy has turned over a new leaf and is ready to begin again and I am so thankful to the Lord. Thank you Jesus!

My verse for today is from 2nd Corinthians 5:19

"Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation; the old is gone, the new has come!"


My prayer for today:

Holy, Holy, Holy God:

Thank you so much for the work you are doing in Jordy's life. Thank you for bringing him back to you. Thank you for lifting the veil from his eyes. Thank you for answering all the many prayers that have been lifted up on his behalf. Thank you for faithful Christian friends and family. Thank you for your son Jesus, that took it upon himself to die for our sins, so that we may have new life. Strengthen and empower Jordy to move forward with a new life in serving you. Protect him from the Satan, the enemy and his schemes. Have Jordy turn to you Lord for his help, not to alcohol and drugs. Thank you for the life of this blessed son of ours.

In Jesus Holy Name I pray,
Amen