Under His Wings, you will find refuge.

Under His Wings, you will find refuge.

Monday, April 26, 2010

Only God knows the number of our days...

Life is the greatest journey of all.

A wonderful, frustrating, difficult, satisfying, up and down day to day adventure we are all on. We are born on this earth, not of our own choosing, but part of God Almighty's plan. We struggle through life, trying to find where we fit in, always searching for more, for better, for the best life has to offer.

But what does the best life has to offer mean to me, to you, to anybody walking down the street? We grow up, we live our short time of this earth, and then we go home to our eternal home with the Lord. None of us, and I mean, none of us, know how much time we have here, or why God put us here. Your candle can burn brightly for a long time, or be snuffed out quickly, almost before it has a chance to glow.

As I write this afternoon, my Dad has had another setback. The emergency surgery went well yesterday, but now this afternoon, he is in acute renal failure. He's had a very hard couple of months starting with his stroke in February. My Dad is a very strong man, but he's worn down. Worn down by going to see Mom each day at the nursing home for the last year, worn down by living by himself for the first time in 62 years, worn down by life. Pop has been healthy most of his life, so he doesn't do sick well (although I don't really think any of us do sick well).

I am so thankful that my brothers are both well and healthy and live near him and Mom with their families. That has been such a blessing for them these past 12 years. The support that the whole family has given them, especially this last year, has been something they will never forget. They are very devoted to them, and have added so much to their lives because of that devotion. I am and always will be eternally grateful to all of them for that.

I'm praying for my Pop tonight, praying that they get his kidneys up and running and he can live some more. But, maybe that's not part of God's plan. Only the Creator of the Universe knows the plan, not me. I want Pop to stay here longer, because I want him here for me, for Mom, for my brothers and their families who live so close, but maybe that's not what God wants. I have totally selfish reasons for wanting my Dad to stay with us longer. My prayer now is for God's will to be done. Not an easy thing to pray for, but I believe, the absolute right prayer at this time.

It's so hard being so far away, it's hard being sick myself and not being able to just jump on a plane right now. But I can't do it, I physically can't do it. So, I need to turn it all over to God. I can't fix this, I can only pray for him, and that is what I am doing, full force today. My Pop knows the Lord, he is a strong believer in Jesus Christ, so I know he will spend his eternity with God. What a comfort that is not to have to worry about that. I just don't want him to suffer anymore than he has to - but that's all in God's Hands too. We all go through this time in life. Lord, help me get through this.

I've been thinking about the time I was able to spend up on our mountain in NC with my folks a few years ago. We were having some work done on our slope and Steve couldn't get away, so Mom and Pop came up and stayed with me. That was a wonderful time together. They loved it up there and I am so grateful that we had that week together. Mom used to love to out on the deck in the morning drinking her coffee and looking down into the valley and Pop loved to the quiet and the beauty of it all. Thank you Jesus that we had that time together. I will always cherish those memories.

I've been reading the beloved 23rd Psalm this afternoon as I think about my Dad. My verse is Psalm 23-4 "Even though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil, for you are with me, your rod and your staff, they comfort me."

My prayer for today:

Lord God Almighty,

My Pop is walking through this valley right now, but only YOU know the hours of his days. Give him Your comfort and Your peace. Heal him Lord if if be your will. Guide the doctors and the nurses and everyone taking care of him. Help him not to be in pain. Please Lord, be with my family, with my Mom and my brothers and all of my family who love Pop so much. Give them strength to get through these days, knowing that You are in charge of all. Thank you Lord for my Dad and his life and the wonderful legacy that he has always given our family.

In Jesus Name I pray,
Amen

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